Obsessed

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We go to bars so we can behave like children, toddlers, really. You ever go to a bar at 2am? You might as well be picking up a kid at nursery school.

Jim Gaffigan

Obsessed

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Gaffigian, Jim. "Obsessed." Comedy Central Special. 27 Apr. 2014, Comedy Central. Originally presented on 18 Jan. 2014 at the Wilbur Theater, Boston, MA, USA.

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It's amazing how our attitude on alcohol changes, right? Cause even as a teenager you know it's wrong. You're like, "You know, I don't like the taste of it, but I want to look cool." And then in your twenties you're like, "You know what, this kinda gives me confidence to talk to the opposite sex." Then in your forties you're like, "You know what, this is the only thing I like about being alive."

Jim Gaffigan

Obsessed

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Gaffigian, Jim. "Obsessed." Comedy Central Special. 27 Apr. 2014, Comedy Central. Originally presented on 18 Jan. 2014 at the Wilbur Theater, Boston, MA, USA.

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Really the only time to ever drink a shot is never. No one's ever drank a shot and then done something they're proud of.

Jim Gaffigan

Obsessed

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Gaffigian, Jim. "Obsessed." Comedy Central Special. 27 Apr. 2014, Comedy Central. Originally presented on 18 Jan. 2014 at the Wilbur Theater, Boston, MA, USA.

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