Film

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I believe the common denominator of the universe is not harmony, but chaos, hostility, and murder.

Grizzly Man

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Grizzly Man. Directed by Werner Herzog, Discovery Docs/Real Big Production, 2005.

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And I love you. Because I've learned that Platonic love can exist between two grown men.

Wayne's World

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Wayne's World. Directed by Penelope Spheeris, Paramount Pictures, 1992.

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Human beings were not meant to sit in little cubicles staring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms, and listening to eight different bosses drone on about mission statements!

Office Space

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Office Space. Directed by Mike Judge, Judgemental Films, 1999.

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Oh, life is like that. Sometimes, at the height of our revelries, when our joy is at its zenith, when all is most right with the world, the most unthinkable disasters descend upon us.

Ralphie Parker

A Christmas Story

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A Christmas Story. Directed by Bob Clark, Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, 1983.

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Well, you told me I have a plethora. And I just would like to know if you know what a plethora is. I would not like to think that a person would tell someone he has a plethora, and find out that person has no idea what it means to have a plethora.

El Guapo

Three Amigos!

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Three Amigos. Directed by John Landis, Orion Pictures, 1986.

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Call me crazy, but it is my philosophy that in order to be successful, one must project an image of success, at all times.

American Beauty

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American Beauty. Directed by Sam Mendes, Jinks/Cohen Company, 1999.

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People gotta talk themselves into law and order before they do anything about it. Maybe because down deep they don't care. They just don't care.

High Noon

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High Noon. Directed by Fred Zinnemann. Stanley Kramer Productions, 1952.

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I believe in two things: discipline and the Bible. Here you'll receive both. Put your trust in the Lord; your ass belongs to me. Welcome to Shawshank.

The Shawshank Redemption

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The Shawshank Redemption. Directed by Frank Darabont, Castle Rock Entertainment, 1994.

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There are only two things more beautiful than a good gun—a Swiss watch or a woman from anywhere.

Red River

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Red River. Directed by Howard Hawks, Monterey Productions, 1948.

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A real loser is somebody who's so afraid of not winning they don't even try.

Little Miss Sunshine

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Little Miss Sunshine. Directed by Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris, Big Beach Films/Bona Fide Productions/Third Gear Productions, 2006.

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Now I want you to remember that no bastard ever won a war by dying for his country. He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country.

Patton

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Patton. Directed by Franklin J. Schaffner. 20th Century Fox, 1969.

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You're fast with that gun, Matt. Awful fast. But your heart's soft. Too soft. Might get you hurt some day.

Red River

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Red River. Directed by Howard Hawks, Monterey Productions, 1948.

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We just don't recognize the most significant moments of our lives while they're happening. Back then I thought, "Well, there'll be other days." I didn't realize that that was the only day.

Field of Dreams

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Field of Dreams. Directed by Phil Alden Robinson, Gordon Company, 1989.

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Love, love, you know what love is? Love is an illusion created by lawyer types like yourself to perpetuate another illusion called marriage to create the reality of divorce and the illusionary need for divorce lawyers.

St. Elmo's Fire

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St. Elmo's Fire. Directed by Joel Schumacher, Channel-Lauren Shuler, 1985.

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Don't ever let anyone ever say to you, 'You shouldn't regret anything.' Don't do that, don't! You regret what you fucking want! And use that, use that, use that regret for anything, anyway you want. You can use it, okay?

Magnolia

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Magnolia. Directed by Paul Thomas Anderson, Ghoulardi Film Company/JoAnne Sellar Productions, 1999.

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Maybe there ain't no sin and there ain't no virtue, they's just what people does. Some things folks do is nice and some ain't so nice, and that's all any man's got a right to say.

The Grapes of Wrath

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The Grapes of Wrath. Directed by John Ford. 20th Century Fox, 1940.

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We're gonna be in college soon. You know who's gonna be in college, right?...Women. College women. Women with no curfew, women on the pill, and women...women, bro. We're staring into the future here and the future is women.

Can't Hardly Wait

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Can't Hardly Wait. Directed by Harry Elfont and Deborah Kaplan, Columbia Pictures/Tall Trees Productions, 1998.

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Why can't a woman be more like a man?
Men are so honest, so thoroughly square;
Eternally noble, historically fair;
Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat.
Why can't a woman be like that?

Professor Henry Higgins

My Fair Lady

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"A Hymn to Him." My Fair Lady. Directed by George Cuko, performed by Rex Smith, Warner Bros., 1964.

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Let me tell you something kid. Everybody gets one chance to do something great. Most people never take the chance, either cause they're too scared, or they don't recognize it when it spits on their shoes. This is your big chance and you shouldn't let it go by.

The Sandlot

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The Sandlot. Directed by David Mickey Evans, Island World, 1993.

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I know you're taking it in the teeth out there, but the first guy through the wall, he always gets bloody. Always. This is threatening not just a way of doing business, but in their minds, it's threatening the game. Really what it's threatening is their livelihoods, it's threatening their jobs. It's threatening the way that they do things. And every time that happens, whether it's the government, or a way of doing business, or whatever it is, the people who are holding the reins—they have their hands on the switch—they go batshit crazy.

Moneyball

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Moneyball. Directed by Bennett Miller, Columbia Pictures/Scott Ruding Productions/Michael De Luca Productions/Rachael Horovitz Productions/Plan B Entertainment, 2011.

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