The military

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I never joined the Army because "at ease" was never that easy to me. It seemed rather uptight still. I don't relax by parting my legs slightly and putting my hands behind my back.

Mitch Hedberg

Strategic Grill Locations

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Hedberg, Mitch. Strategic Grill Locations. 7 Sept. 1999, The Laff Stop Comedy Club, Houston, Texas, USA.

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A gay Vietnam veteran... They gave me a medal for killing two men-and a discharge for loving one.

Leonard Matlovich

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Inscription on his tombstone.

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Matlovich, Leonard. Inscription on tombstone. 1988.

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You don't need to wear a patch on your arm to have honor.

A Few Good Men

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A Few Good Men. Directed by Rob Reiner, Castle Rock Entertainment, 1992.

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I got no fight with any man who does what he's told, but when he don't, the machine breaks down. And when the machine breaks down, we break down.

Platoon

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Platoon. Directed by Oliver Stone, Hemdale Film Corporation, 1986.

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Now, an army is a team. It lives, eats, sleeps, fights as a team. This individuality stuff is a bunch of crap.

Patton

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Patton. Directed by Franklin J. Schaffner. 20th Century Fox, 1969.

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The deadliest weapon in the world is a Marine and his rifle. It is your killer instinct which must be harnessed if you expect to survive in combat. Your rifle is only a tool. It is a hard heart that kills. If your killer instincts are not clean and strong you will hesitate at the moment of truth. You will not kill. You will become dead marines and then you will be in a world of shit because marines are not allowed to die without permission. Do you maggots understand?

Gunnery Sargent Hartman

Full Metal Jacket

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Full Metal Jacket. Directed by Stanley Kubrick, Natant/Harrier Films, 1987.

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Today, you people are no longer maggots. Today, you are Marines. You're part of a brotherhood. From now on until the day you die, wherever you are, every Marine is your brother. Most of you will go to Vietnam. Some of you will not come back. But always remember this, marines die. That's what we're here for. But the Marine Corps lives forever and that means you live forever.

Gunnery Sargent Hartman

Full Metal Jacket

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Full Metal Jacket. Directed by Stanley Kubrick, Natant/Harrier Films, 1987.

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This is a different kind of army. If you look back through history you will see men fighting for pay, or women, or some other kind of loot. They fight for land, power, because a king leads them, or just because they like killing. But we're here for something new. This has not happened much in the history of the world. We are an army out to set other men free. America should be free ground, all of it, not divided by a line between slave state and free. All the way from here to the Pacific Ocean. No man has to bow, no man born to royalty. Here we judge you by what you do, not by who your father was. Here you can be something. Here is the place to build a home. But it's not the land. There's always more land. It's the idea that we all have value, you and me. What we're fighting for, in the end, you're fighting for each other.

Gettysburg

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Gettysburg. Directed by Ronald F. Maxwell, Turner Pictures/TriStar Television/Esparza/Katz Productions, 1993.

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Now for some reason I fit in the army like one of them round pegs. It's not really hard. You just make your bed real neat, remember to stand up straight, and always answer every question with, "Yes, Drill Sargent!"

Forrest Gump

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Forrest Gump. Directed by Robert Zemeckis, The Tisch Company, 1994.

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To be a good soldier you must love the army. To be a good commander you must be willing to order the death of the thing you love.

Gettysburg

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Gettysburg. Directed by Ronald F. Maxwell, Turner Pictures/TriStar Television/Esparza/Katz Productions, 1993.

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